Friday, July 31, 2009

Friday, July 17, 2009

What day is it?

From time to time, I experience a little confusion and disorientation upon waking. This morning, for example, I thought it was Saturday. The little bit of joy that I felt for being able to sleep in was quickly replaced by the sad realization that my work week has not yet ended.

Fuck my life.

Friday, July 10, 2009

Bowel Movement #5 in F minor

My body will typically commence its bowel movement within 20 minutes of waking. It has its reasons. Well, the other day I decided to head into work really early without first taking care of business. My body did not appreciate this change in plans and expressed its displeasure in the form of early labor. The world, too, conspired against me with unusually heavy traffic and red lights. I did not end up soiling myself in traffic, although I know you wish I had.

It was a small victory for Mind, even though I know the Body will win in the long run.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Bob Lob Law


Say it to yourself.

Saturday, July 4, 2009

iAm not a genius, so iTunes does the work for me.

Happy Independence Day

Hello and welcome to the Independence Day edition of A Magical and Wondrous Blog. Please feel free to enjoy the music playing in the background as you reflect on what it means to be an American citizen. Additionally, I invite you to make yourselves comfortable and safe within the confines of your underground bunkers as you await alien invasion.

It is only a matter of time before we are all made into slaves and eaten alive by an alien race of giant insects.